Mualimah Salma Khalfan Alawi

There is no problem to recite the nawafil and the qaza alongside.

Firstly, remember that you're on on the path of serving Islam directly and it is upon Allah to help you get every kind of sustenance, be it knowledge or even worldly. The structure of the hawza is as follows:
The preliminary level (Muqaddamat): Arabic literature, logic, semi-analytical fiqh, and Usul al-fiqh. This takes around 3 to 4 years.
The intermediate level (Sath): Text-based analytical fiqh and usul al-fiqh. Another 2 years.
The advanced level (Kharij lessons) it could take even 10 years depending on how much you would like to advance in the subject.
As for the expenditure, The hawza provides with a student monthly allowance of around 20 dollars for the first years, then it increases to reach around 30. This suffices many students who live very simply.
Other than that there are few other options like eg: You can write or translate books later on or even teach.
All in all, You will go back to your country and serve your community so consider yourself an asset for Islam. If you dedicate yourself to this path, then with the will of Allah, every financial problem can be solved.
Students usually come with some saved capital they have from back home and either keep it in the bank as their savings or spend little by little as they go on. Bills and groceries aren't too expensive if you prefer a simple life. The rent of simple houses are like 100 US or less monthly, with a down payment of maybe 1000 US which you get back when you vacate the house. As for groceries and bills, it could come up to 100 US as well so that comes up to approximately 200 to 250 US monthly depending on your standard of living. People who don't have any capital at hand also survive and are so happy studying with their families. Once you get your resident student visa, your wife can be allowed to study in either Jamia tuz Zahra or Bintul Huda Hawza.
I suggest you be in touch with any seminary student living in your country so that he can give you many other details. Every one has their own experience but All in All, no one regrets being a hawza student even with all the challenges they might face.

Qunut is a mustahab act in namaz, therefore the namaz doesn't become invalid if missed.

Now that you know your problem of being extremist in matters of taharat, you can easily evade it from your mind if you are determined. Many renowned scholars have actually said that consider everything pak (pure) even the water found around the washroom. If shaitan instigates that Allah will be displeased with you and nothing of your worship will be accepted, then say its ok, let it be that way. Go for this notion in everything you see and touch or eat if it be according to the Islamic limits like basically knowing that the food is cooked halal or no najasat (impurity) seen has touched the item you come across. Seeing here is the operative word, and simply not imagining. If you set this rule for yourself, then you are sure to overcome the problem in no time. Remember, it all depends on your will power to change and no one can do that for you except yourself. If you take these first steps, then for sure Allah will take a tenfold for you and reward you for this struggle inshAllah. I pray you and all those facing this problem to show their power against shaitan and win him over, through the power and help of Allah, the All powerful, the All Merciful.

Brother in faith, take this law seriously like a wajib act and a duty.
Every single thing is pure until you come to have knowledge of its impurity and Najasat.
How can one imagine when this is a fiqhi law initself, that one should see that whatever one claims is Najis, is really Najis, not merely imagined to be so?!
After bathing, do an Ahd to Allah that you willcome out, dry yourself and even if you touch anything, say, tawakkal ala Allah. Go forward and do all your activities. Infact time yourself to have a five minute bath and follow the footsteps of the Holy Prophet of Islam who never wasted water and many times did his wuzu with half a cup of water.
Even if you pick up any item in a shop, be it frozen or not, your hands dont get najis I can promise you that, because again the laws applies, seeing and not imagining. Even if they are kaafir walking around, ahlekitab ie christians are considered pak, As far as hindus are concerned, you can't imagine who touched and who didn't, so still you're not allowed to imagine. If you saw, then to wash only your hands that too for 10 seconds only should be done.
Try to take out a sadqa (charity) to avoid satanic imaginations which you should remember that shaitan loves working on ones imaginations and cannot come in the way of logical and rational thoughts.
Even if you have to use the english bathroom, remember the people who have put all their lives studying and researching to bring put the fiqhi islamic laws have allowed it so they ought to know more about water splashing or not, take their word like how one takes the word and prescription of a doctor, and stop imagining and asking for proofs again. Your responsibility is to follow the law and thats it.
As far as roads and footpaths are concerned, remember the sun is a purifying agent and everything whereupon the sun shines like the walls, roads, streets etc are pure as you go along walking so once again you dont have to worry even for a moment and consider yourself pure. Push these thoughts away through sadqa and seeking refuge in the Merciful Lord.
Avoid eating foods if you really think kaafirs would have cooked it, that should be the only best thing you could do because food makes the soul and the thoughts incurred by food have the greatest impact in our thoughts and actions. Trust all foods cooked by muslims by saying Bismillah before eating and again, consider it pure.
Even if the workplace you go in happen to be kaafirs, touch the items with ease and trust fully in Allah and follow your duty however difficult it may be at first. Before eating, wash your hands for 10 seconds only and never waste water. Remember all the people who suffer from shortages of water and dont even have enough to drink let alone bath or wash. Think of the accountability of the continuous water wastage. Repent and amend, start afresh and never lose hope. If you really truly want that, then follow all these instructions.
Last but not least, call you wife back and tell her to help you doing all this. It's a sure thing that she will do so in her right mind but dont turn back after making this firm decision to change for the better. Allah is with those who help themselves remember.
I pray you get better by the day.

Wudhu is mustahab to do during the period and Quran can be read without reading the ayats pertaining to wajib sajdas and according to some maraaje also the suras which have wajib sajdas. Touching the verses of the Holy Quran is not allowed in this state even if one be in wudhu.

Yes it is allowed and infact mustahab to make oneself clean then sit on a prayer mat and do as much dua as you want.

Permanent Niqab or face veil is not an Islamic requirement; it is a personal choice since Niqab is forbidden during Ihram according to most contemporary scholars based on traditions.
According to some rulings, it is better to cover if there is fear of being watched and attracted by Na Mahram.
Islam is a religion that is as easy as possible to follow. Thus when there is fear of such situations, maybe you can cover half your face and when there is no fear of on lookers, you can wear the normal Hijab without any extra attractions eg makeup, jewelry etc.

Yes, according to Ayatullah Seestani, you can read the Quran except for the those verses which include obligatory Sajdas, although it is not allowed to touch the verses in such a state.
According to some jurists, when one cleans themselves during the prayer time and recites the Holy Quran will earn the same reward as if one is praying.

Wudhu is Mustahab (recommended) to perform
in this state so even if one does that and recites the Holy Quran, she is not allowed to touch the words unlike when one is not in the state of haiz, where one can touch the words when they perform the wudhu.

You can recite the Holy Quran even without wudhu

Being spiritual is a great feeling which comes about when one follows the commands of Allah. One will naturally feel satisfied becoming close to Allah and this will move his heart. In actuality, it is Allah who does that as a gift for the struggle the believers have done by sincere obedience. However, when it is done with the intention of getting spiritual and feeling great, it is nothing but a satanic ruse. Shaitan wants to drive one far from his Lord and uses all the tricks to do that. Of these are what you are facing at the moment ie feeling low about not getting the feeling of spirituality. If you're trying your best, you've got to wait for that and not keep your intention solely for the reason of feeling spiritual, rather, doing it only for the pleasure of Allah is the right spirituality whether you feel it or not. This doesn't mean that you don't have to try by doing zikr and obeying all the commandments Allah has kept for us. Remember, just the fact that you havent given up and are still praying and reciting the Holy Quran is in itself a great spiritual progress, and none but Allah has granted you this guidance
Be humble, thank Allah always and never stop asking for forgiveness. InshAllah when you will come to feel deeply of the warmth of spirituality in your soul, it will be only Allah's pleasure that you will want to have.
The battle against Satan can only be won if we are aware of his traps, and if we apply the strategies to defeat him and the best way to start is doing all your duties only for the nearness and pleasure of Allah. He will surely give you more reward than you ever expected.

Allah is ever Merciful and ever forgiving. If you get the guidance to repent, then know for sure that He is the one to have bestowed you with this tawfeeq and ready to forgive you even if you repeat the sins provided you don't do it intentionally to displease Him and without trying your best to refrain.
Fasting has a great impact on your faith and keeping away from sins so if you can do that, why not. InshAllah you will earn great rewards from fasting and it will keep you away from sinning.
A virgin man can do Mutah with the right woman even without the parents permission if he knows he will fall into haram. Remember to choose the right partner for Mutah which is a marriage after all, be it only a temporary one. Eg a woman who will not harm you in anyway through diseases or one who will keep your dignity even if she’s not a Muslim (Ahl kitab)
Be certain that Allah will surely help you if you hate sinning and He watches those who try all their best and gives them their accord in this world and the hereafter.

Allah surely tests us only to our capabilities. Temptations to sin are also within the nature of mankind who is the creation of Allah and the power to overcome it has been bestowed by Allah, but this is potentially there and when temptations come on the way, this power of resistance and controlling the vicious self is actualized and man resembles the angles or even attains a higher status near Allah because of reaching perfection in a manner that the angles cannot due to their possessing the faculty of intellect only and not having to combat with the desire and anger.
Man has to overcome their extra faculties of desire and anger and make their intellect rule these faculties which help in sinning and temptations if they loose their equilibrium by not using it in their appropriate manner.
The test is great but so is the reward. In the Quran it mentions that
"Indeed, successful is the one who has purified himself."
This purification is to balance the faculties and let the intellect rule the faculty of desire and anger.
You can read.more on this by searching on the perfect man in Islam and books like these mainly found in Al islam.org library.

Regarding this there are numerous verses in the Holy Quran and i will mention one that directly talks about it.

And as for him who fears to stand in the presence of his Lord and forbids his own soul from its whims and caprices then surely Paradise is the abode. (79:40 & 41)
Whims and caprices are none other then sinful instigations set up by ones own vicious self and shaitan.
So, it is a basic fact that we must have self-control in order to refrain from these whims and desires. If we believe that we should just do what we want by satisfying and gratifying ourselves, then there is no point in talking about spiritual direction.
The habit of falling into a sin begins will lack of self control and will power and to build it, there are numerous traditions on how to go about it.
The first step is to awaken ones heart and sincerely repent. Allah loves those who continuously ask for His forgiveness even if they flip and commit some mistakes that they had not intended to along the way.
Great scholars like Ayatullah Bahjat said that if one were to strictly follow the sharia, ie refraining from the forbidden acts and performing all the obligatory actions, one would purify himself and become close to Allah s.w.t.
Whilst doing this, give charity in the way of Allah as much as you can because if you detach the thing you love like property and wealth, then you will begin to taste what purity is all about inshAllah.
Remember, Islam lays for us simple rules to follow and there is nothing complicated on how to go about it. Everything is in our innate disposition to follow and this is but a reminder for us.
The guilt you have is because you innate self wants to be the best infront of your creator, who is pure and wants His servants to also be pure so that they can get closer to Him and attain perfection.

Yes it is a true fact that the Holy Prophet (s.a.w) granted this form of recitation to His beloved daughter Hazrat Fatema (s.a) and declared it to be better than a maidservant and in fact and whole world and what is in it. You can find out of its merits in dua.org by typing significance of the tasbeeh.

There is no specific dua apart from the general duas which you should always make for your children. One dua you should recite daily is the dua for ones children and this is found in Saheefa Sajjafiya of Imam Sajjad (a.s). Its an excellent dua and inshallah both you and your children can benefit from it.
If your son is simply not ready to listen, then the least you can do is to explain him that in order not to affect his future generation after marrying a Kaafir woman, he should at least make her accept the shia faith. After doing your duty to your best, leave the rest upon Allah and be calm. By nagging and forcing, you can never amend any relationship whatsoever. Let him experience it if he insists and see the outcome himself. You may never know, she might change her faith and become better than expected such that she could help your son in turn. Many Such incidents have been heard to happen also in my knowledge.
InshAllah things will take their own path but try never to disown your son even if you have to appear otherwise for him to realize his mistakes.

Your sister is vulnerable in her own situation and advising her to stop this relationship is futile. If you think you wont be nagging by taking some examples of such marriages between different sects of religion that have failed or are facing a lot of hardship, maybe you can give her such examples. You could also advice her lovingly to seek advice from a learned member of the community or an elder or close aunt or even a good friend of hers. In the meantime you and your parents can pray and tell her without pressuring her that she should really think well before making this big decision which would effect her and even her generation ahead.
If the person she's chosen is a good man, he might change also due to her, one may never know, although it is quite rare but it is possible. To marry a sunni is not forbidden if they don't have ill feelings towards the Holy Prophet and his family. If they do, then they would not be sunni but Naasibi.
In the end, maybe you can tell her to take out an istekhara and see what Allah has to say regarding the marriage. After all she will be confused when you all are warning her of the consequences so it befits that you take out an istekhara after she makes the intention and wants it to be done.
Every kind of prayer can be done to ask Allah for good outcomes eg, isteghfaar, salawats, reciting Hadithe kisa, a forty day amaal, etc.
InshAllah she will make the right decision.

When a mother faces such a predicament in life, it becomes incumbent on all her children to help her and take care of her physically and emotionally as much as they can. Due to the son being the stronghold of the family after the father, it is his duty to care for his mother even if his wife is not able to. In Islam, the sons wife should regard her mother in law like her mother and take as much care of her, but if for some reasons she cannot or does not wish to do so, then it is upon her son to hire someone to take care of her if he himself cannot take up the heavy responsibility to take care of his handicapped mother. The reward is immense and so is the satisfaction not to mention the heartfelt prayers done by a helpless mother to her children.
As for the daughters, they too should share some kind of responsibility if they have support from their spouses and families and if it doesn't hinder her other responsibilities. The same reward would also go for them.
Be sure that to leave a mother facing such a helpless state and not receiving help from her children will surely earn the wrath of Allah.
The children should remind themselves when they were young and helpless that it was their mother who bore many difficulties to raise them. This is a test from Allah to see if they're performing their duties well enough now.
Lastly, they should also remember to be kind and benevolent to their mother who also needs emotional support apart from being helped physically. InshAllah it will be easy for them with the help of Allah.

If you were to recite Dua Ahad for 40 days and continue doing so sincerely, you will see the imam of our time InshAllah. More important than that is that he is always a witness for us and seeing our deeds day in day out. When one is watchful over this, you will feel the blessed presence of Imam Mahdi (a.s) and this will give you a deep happiness and satisfaction even more than seeing him in presence. He surely knows how much his shia remember him and yearn to be in his presence so this meeting will be fulfilled some day or the other inshAllah.
All duas are answered because calling Allah has no refusal. The prayer can be delayed or something better can be given, or sins can be wiped away or every thing can be fulfilled including reward for calling upon Allah in this world and the hereafter. Every thing is giving here from the one is is always listening and loves one who calls upon him with sincerity.
Dua of Tawassul is specially for asking for fulfilment of Hajat. Recite that regularly and inshAllah all your prayers will be answered.

Gheebah or talking bad about a person or people in their absence is mentioned in the Holy Quran as an evildoing and like eating the flesh of ones dead brother which is deplorable.
However, the doors of forgiveness are always open to a believer who does not wish to repeat his mistake and truly asks repentance to Allah s.w.t.
It would be a good thing to ask the person who was talked about for forgiveness, although in most cases, the ill feeling would tend to increase. Therefore, one can take out sadaqa for the person and try his best to spread good words about him wherever he talked evil about the person in a manner that he should be honored in front of those who regarded him a bad person after hearing the gheebah.
It is best to retain good relationship with the person so now one should try their best not to speak anything behind him and amend their relationship of brotherhood.
A true believer will always try his best to stop listening to gheebah as well. In a gathering for instance, one can either excuse one self, or say good about the person when hearing things spoken against him, or even try advising the people around him of the severity of punishment for whose who do gheebah.
All in all, continues repentance should be asked by the one who engages in such an action.

A verse of the Holy Quran strongly emphasizes the importance of brotherhood and the closest of brotherhood should be first felt and started between siblings.

The Holy Quran says,
The believers are but brothers, so make reconciliation between your brothers and fear Allah that you may receive mercy.
Surat al-Hujurat 49:10

Sibling rivalry is sometimes apparent and other times hidden. Its so easy to solve this when it is hidden because when one is so connected with the other and comes from single parents, their hearts soften easily specially if they keep on trying. When this indifference gets more intense such that the actions towards one another get cold, then it could turn to a grudge or dislike but never can it be hatred.
We ought to remember and try our best to help our brothers and sisters, this way, we will begin to feel like helping our brothers and sisters in faith too. In reality we are helping ourselves. When we pray for them, the angels pray for us. Fulfilling the rights of brotherhood in Islam is a means for Allah to support us and reward us in the Hereafter. Failing our brothers and sisters in Islam results in Allah withdrawing this support.
Try to meet often and take gifts for your siblings to patch up. Write messages and congratulate them sincerely on happy occasions. Show warmth for them in your words and actions even if it be through sending messages or emails and better still by sending gifts for them even if they're small.
I guess if one party is ready to realize this and give in, slowly it will make a huge difference and the relationship amongst the siblings will become stronger with efforts and prayers for the betterment of themselves and the community.
If this is done exclusively for the sake of Allah, it will make things easier inshAllah.

Istekhara should only be taken when there is utter confusion on what action should be taken. In your case, it was so obvious for you that the spouse you had selected for yourself matched the right criteria, therefore, there was no need of istekhara in the first place. If your parents did that without your deep consent even if you outwardly proclaimed otherwise, the istekhara is null and void because you weren't for it due to being sure about your own decision.
On the other hand, scholars say that whenever two istekharas are taken, there should be a different intention for both of them regarding the matter for which it is undertaken. In your case, your parents kept the same intention for both the istekharas so there is a problem to that too.
Thirdly, the person who takes out the istekhara also matters. The more pious and God fearing the person is with the right beliefs and mindset, the more the answer is appropriate.
There are so many deeper meanings of the versus of the Holy Quran that only the awliya of Allah (chosen ones) can understand it so if the istekhara said the marriage would last good for two months, there is simply no proof for the validity and i believe it is superstitious to go for that.
If the shia Mawlana took out the istekhara with your consent only and not your parents, then it is the right one. It is left on you though to convince your parents about this.
Another option is to communicate to your parents and make them understand that it is your own life after all and you yourself have to make the decision, so you have decided to get married to the man of your choice by laying full trust in Allah the Almighty who loves it when decisions are made and trust is kept upon Him, and the outcome will follow with His mercy and blessings InshAllah.

If you have found out about the boy and whether he has the right criteria of being your spouse which is faith and righteous actions coupled with compatibility with yourself, then I suppose it should be enough with duas and tawassul to the Ahl bait (a.s)
There is a form of istekhara that is authenticated in the Ahadith which is from Imam Jaffer Sadiq a.s also in Bihar al Anwar.
If this is done, then taken help from Allah, you will make the decision with your right mind.
This is done as.follows.
First remember the greatness of Allah and His power, then thank and praise Him and then recite salawat for the Holy Prophet and his pure progeny peace be on them and follow it by reciting this phrase
«انی اسئلك و انك عالم الغيب و الشهاده الرحمن و الرحيم و انت علام الغيوب استخير الله برحمه»
The meaning is,
I seek from you, and you are the knower of everything hidden and apparent, the All Merciful and the Ever Merciful, the knower of all secrets, I yearn for goodness from the All perfect Allah through His Mercy.
InshAllah you will get to know how much the boy can be suitable for you when you strongly feel the decision you want to make.

Although every one comes on the earth on a clean slate and pure from all sins, but sometimes the parents do have a role in the future of their children specially if they have sinful lives and haven't repented and not tried to warn their children about the punishment of evildoings.
If parents have sinned but asked for repentance, then the children will have a better chance of being inclined towards the truth and be faithful. In both cases, the child when comes of age has a free will to choose between good and bad and although it becomes difficult to be on the right path for the children whose parents are sinful, it still isn't impossible.
Those whose parents have repented after sinning or are among the faithful ones are more inclined to be on the right path although they can always be misguided because of shaitan being our open enemy and the vicious self which moves us towards evil.
Children will face the consequences of their misguided parents but will not be accounted for their parent's sins.
A verse in the Holy Quran points out to this indirectly also stating the fact that not only is it the duty of parents to warn their children but also if they don't do so, then they will cause their children to also end up in the hell fire with a painful punishment.
The verse is in Sura Tahrim ayat 6 which says,
O you who have believe, protect yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel is people and stones, over which are [appointed] angels, harsh and severe; they do not disobey Allah in what He commands them but do what they are commanded.

According to traditions, a woman during pregnancy enjoys a great reward and her
rank is equal to that of a Martyr (Shaheed)
The Prophet (Peace be upon him) said:
“The reward of a woman, from the time of pregnancy until birth and breastfeeding is the same as the reward of one on the path of Allah, and if a woman leaves this world during that time because of the hardship and pains of birth, she has the reward of a martyr.” 
Keeping this in mind, you should be well aware that Allah expects you to be obedient to Him and do as much as possible to please Him and to earn His pleasure is but to your own benefit and perfection.
You have to see if you can withstand the pain without any repercussion, then stand and pray without prolonging it. If you think you cannot to that, you can do the qiyaam ( standing and reciting the hamd and sura) and rukoo while standing and sajda by sitting and keeping your head upon the turbah on a table or desk.
If you cannot stand and sit, then just sit and pray and do the sajda whilst sitting and keeping your head upon a table whilst doing the sajda. This is for you to decide how much you can bear the pain without any further repercussions like further pain.
Remember to at least start off to repay the qaza of the prayers left undone during the month you missed to pray. Feel blessed that Allah has guided you by reminding you of the importance of prayer through the guilt you have of having missed your prayers. Remind yourself that you have been missing the sweetest conversation and act in this world and be smart to get hold of it before its too late and shaitan gets a chance to overtake you. He doesn't want mankind to benefit from their lives nor does he want them to have the utmost pleasure. Prayers is one thing that if you make it with concentration, you will benefit and have deep satisfaction in your life as well as the life of your child to.be InshAllah.

Your daughter has come of age and if she has an opportunity to go for Hajj, it is the best chance for her to take it and she can control her period by taking appropriate pills. InshAllah she has a fruitful journey.

It seems like your daughter is in a state of confusion and needs help before things could get worse. Shaitan gets to youth who are pure hearted and practice their faith like your daughter is.
Now that you've tried to explain her and she is still confused, try showing her the right books to read and find out for herself. There are many books available on line specially in Al-islam.org like fiqhi laws for youth or exclusively for women and men etc. You can search and show her what books she can be enlightened with and then suggest that you discuss between yourselves. If you know of a good practicing lady in your community, try involving her also in the discussion without making it sound that you are nagging or advising your daughter too much.
Young people often like to discover things for themselves and then do they feel satisfied.
Inshallah with time you will see the change and of course with praying to Allah alongside.

Its good that you have come to realize this at least. Its one instinct that comes to all, and if it is progressed, it will go leaps and bounds and destroy ones faith
Therefore, this undesirable instinct must be curbed with all the force at the disposal of a person. It should not be allowed to flourish and grow. If the instinct of envy is allowed to persist, It will reach such proportions that fighting it out will not be possible.
The first thing you have to do is to inculcate in yourself that whatever your friend has, the giver of the blessings in only Allah and none else, least of it herself. Pray to Allah to bless you with better than that and be happy that Allah can bless a person to such an extent.
Don't ever wish that the blessings being taken away from her because that would mean you are taking in to the instinct of jealousy and making it grow. Don't let shaitan get the upper hand with this undesirable character trait.
Praise her in front of people so that you can share the happiness of her blessings. This is so remarkable an action that you will really begin to feel the happiness even if you did it half-hearted or pretentiously at first. The great thing that will come out of this is that Allah will grant you the same blessing and better than what your friend has inshAllah.

The feeling of wanting to get more connected to our Imam of the time shows that He too is yearning and praying and guiding you towards that. We all fail sometimes to carry out our duties perfectly but that would not mean that we should stop struggling for the same. After trying your best to have sincere intentions and noble actions whilst refraining from the unlawful, you will feel more enlightened and the Almighty Allah will teach you Himself of how to go on further towards the path of perfection.
You can recite Dua of Ahad every morning and make an intention that whatever good you do should be as counted as Hadiya for the Imam of our time.
Other than that, talk to the imam of our time like the one who is most dear and beloved to you and cherish to have those moments. You can talk in a normal way because he knows what goes on in the hearts of the believers.
Please do pray for all the momineen as well to get this connection such that they will be able to serve the imam just like what you want for yourself.
Be sure that your dua has already reached acceptance.

God has created man in a way that whatever he eats and drinks has an influence on his mind, body and soul. 
Haram food effects the soul in way that he won't be able to do any good actions.
As far as eating in gatherings from a non Muslim is concerned, one should be careful to avoid it and try their best to excuse themselves. Although however, if one were to ask Can we eat food cooked by a non Muslim when we do not know whether or not it is clean? According to Ayatullah Seestani, the answer is that a Muslim is allowed to eat any food made by a person whose faith and religion is not known to him, no matter whether that person touched it with wetness or did not touch it, provided that he does not know or is not sure that the food consists of what is forbidden to him.
Also It is permissible to eat the food and it is not necessary for the Muslim to question the person who prepared the food about his beliefs or disbeliefs, or whether or not he had touched the food, even if that inquiry is very convenient and natural for one who wants to ask.
If he knows for sure that they are disbelievers, then it becomes haram for one to consume the food however difficult it may for them to convey to their hosts and in such cases, one has tp either tell them with politeness or find an excuse not to attend the gatherings.

With Allah's unlimited grace, we try all we can to advice our brothers and sisters in faith and earnestly pray for the goodness of everyone and the society as a whole inshallah.
Islam is a perfectly balanced religion without any extremity or negligence and emphasizes that too.
You can request your future spouse if you can stay in another house nearby and mention the reason which is clear that living with nan mahram can be very difficult sometimes.
If he doesn't accept and has all the valid reasons, there is no dead end and you will still be able to practice your hijab and at the same time live up to your husband's expectations especially if you explain him of the limitations of living with a joint family. Taking to him beforehand will prepare his mind of what he will face.
You will of course have your private room to give the rights to your husband and beautify yourself too.
Near your extended family, you can be polite and respectful and wear simple clothing. Never get too close to.your brother in laws at the expense of your faith.
If he doesn't agree to this, then think carefully of the type of spouse you have selected before entering into marriage. Being a hauzawi, you must be aware of the values of our religion which only wants us to lead a perfect life, thus you must have a spouse who is compatible to your thinking and lifestyle also.
InshAllah Allah will help you go about this.

Initially, it may seem unrealistic that any pleasing or harmonious sound could be forbidden and one will be given such a painful punishment for indulging in such a thing, but there is no need to be amazed.
Many verses and traditions point out why ghina ie music is forbidden.
In.short it brings about shamelessness in a person and shaitan overwhelms one listening to it such that he or she starts performing all the satanic acts such as lustful acts and so forth. The intellectual capacity of the person is also reduced and animalistic desires are overtaken. It effects the nervous system also and causes many aliments like high blood pressure and heart problems.
In short, one will be oblivious about the rememberance of Allah and his real aim in life. This infact disrupts the peace within him.
I suggest you read the book "status of Music in Islam" by Saleem Bhimji. This book is available online.
I pray you overcome this feeling that Music is too pleasurable to forego. Remember, the Music that is allowed in Islam is in total harmony with our soul and spiritual upliftment.

Initially, it may seem unrealistic that any pleasing or harmonious sound could be forbidden and one will be given such a painful punishment for indulging in such a thing, but there is no need to be amazed.
Many verses and traditions point out why ghina ie music is forbidden.
In.short it brings about shamelessness in a person and shaitan overwhelms one listening to it such that he or she starts performing all the satanic acts such as lustful acts and so forth. The intellectual capacity of the person is also reduced and animalistic desires are overtaken. It effects the nervous system also and causes many aliments like high blood pressure and heart problems.
In short, one will be oblivious about the rememberance of Allah and his real aim in life. This infact disrupts the peace within him.
I suggest you read the book "status of Music in Islam" by Saleem Bhimji. This book is available online.
I pray you overcome this feeling that Music is too pleasurable to forego. Remember, the Music that is allowed in Islam is in total harmony with our soul and spiritual upliftment.

I hope you will make it a point to read the book I mentioned. The music that is in complete harmony with our soul is recitation of the Holy Quran, Nawhas and Qasidas etc. Some music like war Music is also allowed because it makes the heart revolutionary and want to bring about a major change around the globe by defending the truth ie Islam.
You can start by listening to something like these and judge for yourself. Shaitan may instigate you by cheating you that they're not interesting as the songs you listened to, but trust me, he wants to lay that trap for you so that he can misguide you step by step. Be wise and don't let shaitan beguile you after you have sought for guidance.
InshAllah you will find utmost tranquility in the halal music and get closer to Allah.

The best way to avoid these kind of sins is marriage, be it temporary or permanent as the sheikh told you. Talk to your parents to find a suitable partner for marriage and tell them you don't want to fall in sin.
In the Holy Quran, Allah tells us that if however it is not possible for.you which is of course after you've tried your best, then you have to remain chaste, and Allah will surely reward you and show you a way out of your predicament inshAllah.
Try your best to avoid the circumstances and habits that give rise to those thoughts. spend more time in places where these thoughts are less likely to arise, such as with your parents, siblings or good freinds, or even your local mosque. Busy yourself whenever the thought of sin arises. Seek refuge in Allah from shaitan. Know that if you hate the sin and are trying all your best not to indulge, then Allah loves you as per traditions of Masomeen a.s
Second you should use your mental will power to keep those thoughts out of your mind by keeping away from any kind of bad scenes around you specially the media. You have to vow yourself to Allah if its become a habit for you.
This can help you a great deal through
Fasting, regular prayer and lowering libido-increasing food such as all nuts, chocolate, spices, bananas etc you can research on the foods that have a hot effect in your temperament and avoid taking them.
Regular exercise and swimming also helps exhaust your excess libido.
Its also very good to bath part of the body suffering from sin with cold water.
InshAllah you will soon overcome these sins by practicing all this with great hope and diligence. If you take it lightly, you will only cause harm to yourself and your future generation which inshAllah will be pure if you start now with the help of the All Merciful.

If you have read the Holy Quran and have full faith in every verse being the ultimate truth carrying depths of meanings, then be sure that Allah is even helping you now but you are unaware. How can it be that Allah loves the repenters and purifiers, and He has not accepted your repentance?! Or how can it be possible that you are trying but haven't still got your results? It seems there's something wrong still and you're probably not doing your best to avoid the things that take you towards the sin.
Don't be despondent and keep on trying to follow the things i mentioned previously. There's answers to every thing in this life and more so to stop sinning because Allah wants us to be pure and has created us with a potential even above the angles.
Keep doing isteghfar and try your best to be in wuzu all the time. The fact that you hate your sins so much and are trying hard to stop, i can assure you that Allah loves you as per the tradition of Imam Jaffer Sadiq (a.s)
If you vow to Allah that you wont sin and in case you break it, take out a penalty for yourself eg fasting or a big amount of sadqa.etc, then slowly you will begin to stop the sins altogether and become pure inshAllah.
As for getting married, keep on trying to find the right partner and trust in Allah to make your marriage faster. Right now Allah probably wants you to cleanse yourself before entering into a relationship that will bring peace and harmony to your soul and have a generation of great people inshAllah.
I will surely keep you in my prayers.

If you have read the Holy Quran and have full faith in every verse being the ultimate truth carrying depths of meanings, then be sure that Allah is even helping you now but you are unaware. How can it be that Allah loves the repenters and purifiers, and He has not accepted your repentance?! Or how can it be possible that you are trying but haven't still got your results? It seems there's something wrong still and you're probably not doing your best to avoid the things that take you towards the sin.
Don't be despondent and keep on trying to follow the things i mentioned previously. There's answers to every thing in this life and more so to stop sinning because Allah wants us to be pure and has created us with a potential even above the angles.
Keep doing isteghfar and try your best to be in wuzu all the time. The fact that you hate your sins so much and are trying hard to stop, i can assure you that Allah loves you as per the tradition of Imam Jaffer Sadiq (a.s)
If you vow to Allah that you wont sin and in case you break it, take out a penalty for yourself eg fasting or a big amount of sadqa.etc, then slowly you will begin to stop the sins altogether and become pure inshAllah.
As for getting married, keep on trying to find the right partner and trust in Allah to make your marriage faster. Right now Allah probably wants you to cleanse yourself before entering into a relationship that will bring peace and harmony to your soul and have a generation of great people inshAllah.
I will surely keep you in my prayers.

In Islam it is the duty of a man towards his wife to provide for his wife and for the maintenance of the house expenses even if the woman earns her own income. Although you might know this is the case, remember that you're doing a big Jehad on your part if you be patient and not complain. Now that you know the attitude of your husband, try to avoid arguments and think about how you can resolve your marriage. In the same way that your husband thinks his heaven lies in serving his father, which is partly true if he doesn't leave his duties towards his family, you can also choose this path of heaven by serving all you can to bring peace and harmony to your family.
Even if you have to pretend, try being nice to him and dont raise any arguments to provoke the matter. Count every day and note it down. This kind of evaluation of one's deeds help alot and you will see with time you will find no arguments in your relationship. Of course this doesn't mean that you have to behave in a cold manner, but rather you have to try your best to talk amicably with your husband. Try to grasp the chance when you can communicate rather than argue. With good intention and effort you will inshAllah change his behaviour.
If you can afford the expenses, do that because of saving your marriage. Remember if your marriage breaks God forbid, it would be a big heartache for you and your children which im sure you wouldn't like. Any financial savings will not be able to give you the least pleasure.
Allah helps those who help themselves first. Im sure with this motto in mind and with Tawakkul in the Almighty Allah and love towards your family, you will cause a big change in your life with everyone around you including your father in-law who is in the position of your father in Islam. Think that your husband is spending for your father and Allah will increase your sustanance a tenfold inshAllah.

Your efforts will surely be rewarded by the Almighty Allah in this world and the hereafter. Remember Allah only tests a person according to his or her capacity. You do have the strength to bear all this if you have strong faith. All I can say is that this is a test of Allah and He only wants to polish your soul ready for His most beautiful blessings like the love of Allah and His chosen ones.
Try to prepare your work before hand like a night before. Maybe you can continue the quick half the following day and be ready to serve. Ask Allah to help you constantly by reminding yourself through Zikr of Allah. If you're able to have a helper, you can employ one at a part time so that your work load is decreased. If all this is not possible for you, then inculcate in yourself that Allah is always helping you either directly or indirectly so if you're alone, its Allah helping you directly which should give alot of energy to the soul and should propel you towards your activities.
Im certain that if you are desperate, Allah will send help for you in a way you never imagined so have trust in that and try your best to do all the things you can in the right way, then leave the result on Allah.

Welcome to the Shia faith. If one truly wants to practice Islam, he will surely see the truth in the followers of Ahl bait (a.s). It is a creed where one wants to encourage unity between all the Muslims. Whether they be Shia or any other sect for that matter.
It is a matter of Honor that you're trying all your best as per performing wuzu and other practices according to the Shia way. Infact if you read more about this, you will see perfect logic behind it too and of course with proof from the right sources like Quran and traditions of the Holy Prophet (s.a.w) and his household.

I recommend you to read books on the site, Al islam.org library. Books like then i was guided, Ask those who Know, peshawar nights etc. Theyre from authors who converted from sunni to shia faith. You will get all your answers and more of you study these books well inshAllah.
Try as much as possible to continue your research and practice it in privacy as much as you can unless you know that your life will be in danger, then you can practice Taqiyya which is hiding your faith in public.
Well you say your family will never accept shiism and theyre die hard followers of their own creed, maybe you should try showing your best behaviour with them in a manner that would impress them to be more attracted to you and maybe tell them on the sideline that all Muslims should.be united for one. Also the fact that the true shia would never talk ill about the sunni. Infact you can take the example of revolutionary leaders like Ayatullah Khumeini who always insisted on unity between all the Muslims. Remind them the sayings of the Holy Prophet about Imam Ali a.s and tell them politely that how comes the Holy Prophet himself loved H. Ali in such a compassionate way and his followers would do otherwise? Radhiallahu ( may Allah be pleased with him) and Alaihi salam (may peace of Allah be with him) should not make much of a difference if they come to.know the status of this great leader.
Maybe you can start by asking whilst pretending to wonder about the questions after researching and giving them food for thought. If they have some unreasonable answers, you can tell them your opinion in a manner that they should not think you've changed your faith. Do as much as you can in subtle ways and leave the rest on Allah. Your efforts will pay for sure. Pray for them and ask Allah to guide them. When you feel bad about what they're saying ill against Shiism, Ask the Almighty to forgive them. Slowly itll take effect.

Do tawassul to the Ahl.bait and ask for their goodness in every way which is what the Shia creed teaches us, ie wanting all the Muslims the blessings and goodness like what they themselves have. Now that you have the light in your heart, I'm sure you also wants your near and dear ones to share this light.
In the end it is only Allah who can give them the Hidaya and it is your work to prepare the grounds by doing dua and acting in the best manner near them.

Its a good thing to try getting to know your potential spouse by talking to him with the permission of your parents ofcourse, but there are limits to this.
All the experts of law confirm to the fact that if the intention is truly for marriage purposes and not one that leads to any kind of lust or desire through words or actions is allowed.
You should also remember that one can never be able to really know a person as well unless one lives with a person under a roof, or even when one gets committed like reciting a temporary marriage seegha so that one could freely talk.
The solution is either be careful in what you converse by not going too far in your relationship through your words and expressions, or request for a temporary Aqd of Nikah to be recited so you can just talk and get to know each other. If at all you try freely conversing, you might fall in a forbidden act which is a sin.
You can remind your potential spouse of what Islam says about relationships with Na mahram before the Nikah and get to know him a little through a couple of.meetings and maybe asking your questions through media or something without getting carried away. In the process you can know if he holds it important to follow the shairat too. If you are careful, inshAllah you will not fall into a forbidden act.

Your concern for this feeling already shows the love of Imam Mahdi for you. It could be a test from Allah who wants you to keep on trying harder.
Some of the ways that scholars of Islam suggest are such as, reciting dua e Ahad every morning, giving sadqa for his well being, and infact, giving all your good actions as hadiya to Imam, and last but not least, being united with the Imam in all His actions eg praying on time the way he does, mourning for Imam Hussein a.s and so forth. Be careful in evaluating your actions day in day out and see what else is missing in your book of deeds.
If you are sincere in this which inshAllah you are, then it'll be in no time when you will begin to feel that burning sensation again and it will keep on growing i can promise you that!
Be sure to pray for all the Shia to get these great feelings too, that way, our imam will have enough companions to make his reapprearance happen soon inshAllah.

Everything that happens to us in our lives is predestined. However, that does not mean that we need to sit and wait to see what happens, rather, we should do all our best to make a good thing happen to us and leave the result on Allah. This effort on our part is part of the causes that brings about the final effect and result.
Also you should remember that a thing might be predestined by Allah but certain other causes can divert that eg through praying and sadqa, good relations to the relatives ie sile rehmi can divert many tribulations or diversities to occur in our lives.
Keep on praying and do your best to take out charity everyday, keep well with ypur kith and kin and never leave praying to Allah. InshAllah you will get the right partner of your choice with the right criteria which is a man of faith and righteous deeds with the right ideology.
I would suggest you to read sura Maryam and practice and apply the verses in your daily life. You will see in no time you will be blessed with an ideal spouse who will bring you a generation of leaders inshAllah.

Being aware of your thoughts is a very good way to start controlling them.
Scholars suggest reciting
'la hawla wa la Quwwata illa billahil Aliyyil Azeem' to be recited everyday after the morning prayer and night prayer seven times before which every lahawla, one should also recite Bismillahirrahmanirraheem.

InshAllah if you hate these recurring thoughts and try your best to control them with dua and struggle on your part, Allah will surely help you overcome them in no time.
Keep yourself busy with healthy activities and also exhaust your energy with lots of exercise and healthy sleep. Eat the right foods which is a balanced diet for your body temperament. You can search on that for youself.
Be in good company who remind you of Allah. Listen to good lectures online and try your best to shed tears in privacy. Be sure you will. The fact that you couldn't cry for imam Hussein a.s doesn't mean you dont love him, rather your concern shows your love for Imam Hussein a.s and he himself will help you if you ask for everything through his wasila inshAllah.
Read Quran before sleeping even if it be a page with the translation.
InshAllah your mind will have good food for thought and you will realize there's so much to life than just wasting it on evil sinful thoughts.

Its very good to be educated about your rights as well the rights of your spouse. This way your respect for him will increase and it may change your outlook that the situation is not like a for or against one towards another. Its rather a perfect balance.

The rights of a wife can be divided into common and particular rights. The common ones that she shares with her spouse are that behaving with honour and equity towards each other, adorn and gratify each other with sexual needs and rearing and providing needs for their children physically, mentally and spiritually. The financial responsibility lies with the father.

As for the exclusive rights of a wife, they are that she is to be protected and guarded by her husband.
The rights of a wife exclusively can be summarized as follows.
1. Providing for the expenses of the family, making plans through consultation, and managing the incomes and expenditures of the family
2. Safeguarding, protecting, and looking after all members of the family
3. Overseeing religious, moral, and cultural issues of family members, guiding them towards improvement and spiritual and physical development, and preventing social and ethical corruption within the family.

In Islam, the responsibility of guardianship, supervision, and management of the family have been set on the shoulders of men. As Allah the Exalted, has stated in the Holy Quran.
This shows that man cannot control her in every aspect of life but can protect and supervise her which is perfectly suitable.for her makeup.
Last but not least, there's a tradition also that says,
A woman came to the Prophet (S) and said, ‘O Messenger of Allah! What are the rights of men upon their wives?’ He replied, ‘She must obey him and not be disobedient. She must not give charity from his house without his permission. She must not perform voluntary fasts without his permission. She must not deny him her body, even if she is on the back of a camel. ( About to go somewhere) And she must not exit her home without his permission.

This does not show any kind of dictatorship as such because the man with his mindset knows how the woman reacts after judging that for example when she goes to certain places, she will react more emotionally and probably cause turmoil in her homely affairs. If this is for a true concern on his part, then its acceptable or else its very unethical if he prevents her from going to her relatives. The places he should prevent his wife from going are those where unlawful acts are done eg mixed gatherings or an unsuitable work place or party etc.
A cleaver woman knows how to deal with this and can probably promise him that all things will remain calm instead of breaking his ego and forcing him to let her go. InshAllah slowly and gradually you will make your husband agree to the halal places you would like to go.

Im sure you would like to secure your family relations in every way, and to do that, you have to be smart enough to inculcate in your child about all the positive things in his or her father. When this kind of positive manipulation is done, the child will calmly talk to his father and probably make him feel guilty in the end, this will come with time and patience but its definitely worth a try.
When your husband will see how wisely you bring up your child, he will inshAllah come to his senses and give you more permission than you ever thought of. With prayers and patience, mountains can be moved!

There is no dua as such mentioned, because Allah has preplanned this love to enter after marriage as a gift ready between the spouses. It is only the fault of each or both that spoil this through their actions. To make it appear strong again is to polish the soul with good actions and mercy and care for each other. Search for it and you will see it. There is a verse of the Holy Quran that says,
And those who say, "Our Lord, grant us from among our wives and offspring comfort to our eyes and make us an example for the righteous." Furqan :74
This verse was recited in the qunoot of the prayer of the Holy Prophet (s.a.w) everyday. This will surely make a difference in your married life if you are steadfast in reciting it.
Try to recite it with your family together whilst raising your hands above your heads as suggested by ulema.
Encourage her by requesting her to present herself the way you like maybe through explaining her about your choice.
If you don't feel the way you want or expect to, ignore it and keep on trying and praying, im certain things will change because of your goodwill and intention.
Your actions and kindnesses will make her glow with the inner beauty which keeps growing and never fades like the outer beauty. This is the principle in life, all are attracted to the inner beauty of a person rather than the outer.
InshAllah you will both experience and share this deep love and devotion towards each other.

Salams.
I hope you will make it a point to read the book I mentioned. The music that is in complete harmony with our soul is recitation of the Holy Quran, Nawhas and Qasidas etc. Some music like war Music is also allowed because it makes the heart revolutionary and want to bring about a major change around the globe by defending the truth ie Islam.
You can start by listening to something like these and judge for yourself. Shaitan may instigate you by cheating you that they're not interesting as the songs you listened to, but trust me, he wants to lay that trap for you so that he can misguide you step by step. Be wise and don't let shaitan beguile you after you have sought for guidance.
InshAllah you will find utmost tranquility in the halal music and get closer to Allah.

Salat is the cream of all our actions and worship.
Its good that you are concerned about it and want to make it better.
Ulama (schoalars) suggest a list of things to help making ones concentration better in their salat.
I will list a few and you can research on the rest.
1. Perform your wuzu with concentration. There is a short dua to be recited before every part of wuzu that one performs. This should help a great deal whislt we do wuzu.

2. Perform the recommended acts before salat eg. Reciting azan and iqama ( the call of prayer), brush your teeth, put perfume, give a small sadaqa ,wearing clean clothes, combing your hair etc.

3. In your daily activities try making an intention that you are doing everything even wordly for the sake of Allah and this way your prayers too will be rich with concentration.

4. Read a few books on line eg philosophy of prayer, meaning and commentary of salat by Agha Mohsin Qaraati. His books are simple yet profound.

5. Try to inculcate in yourself that whatever action you make in salat is the most important one, therefore all the actions will be done with concentration inshAllah.

Follow these rules with Tawakkul (trust in Allah) and tawassul (asking help through the Ahlbayt a.s). After all, in every worship we also need the help of Almighty Allah through His chosen servants.

Islam has greatly emphasized on the rights of parents especially the rights and a mother, whether she be a Muslim or non Muslim.
It is only at the expence of disobedience towards Allah's commandments that a child is allowed to disobey his or her parents and that too should be done with utmost politeness.
One should always keep their moral behaviour and show warmth and kindness towards them even if they're harsh. Such a policy can change the outlook of a parent about their child even if they seem to disregard each others views generally speaking.
You are definitely facing a predicament on how to spend your time with two people who dont share the same faith like you.
If accompanying both of these people will lead to sin and you can stop that by excusing yourself politely, then it is incumbent that you do so.
If however your mother will take it to heart and feel much remorse, then you can explain her first about why you don't want to go, and if it were not for the music and other forbidden sins, then you would certainly accompany her in the trip.
If she still feels very bad about this that you feel it will completely spoil your relationship in the long run, then go along with her but at the same time try all you can do avoid sinning. You can do zikr and isteghfar ie remember Allah and ask for forgiveness when the music is heard, and lower your gaze when you see any one who is ill dressed and not Mahram ie lawful for you.
As for your friends, you can simply excuse yourself if you have to take your mother, and if not, you will still have to think of.anything but to let go off the probable awaited sin of falling into lust.

Remember they don't have any right as such over you and all the more so since they are non Muslims.
For humanity sake, you can still show your good behaviour and keep your relations with them but never at the expence of your faith.

Remember, the Almighty Lord is always besides you when you do the right thing.

You must be aware that Islam has given the full right of guardianship to a father to make important decisions in life for his daughter, specially when it comes to marriage.
You may have seen many right qualities in the spouse that you have selected for yourself but your father is not wrong to want to find out about the boy and his family.
Remember, it is only to your benefit and advantage that he wants to inquire more about the boy.
This is due to his experience and concern that he has for you.
It doesn't hurt if you have to go out of your way and get all the necessary whereabouts as to how you can go about the process of finding out about the boy and his family.
If at all there are some things that your father doesn't like about his family and you can handle them, convince your father or even take some assistance from your close relatives who are able to talk to him. Let them remind him that your choice for spouse selection is done with the right criteria and Alhamdulillah the boy will soon start his job and able to support you financially also. If the marriage transpires and he is supported by his parents for a while, there's nothing wrong with that as long as there is no forbidden act.
If all this is not possible at all, and he is confused after trying his best, then you could go for an istekhara and see the outcome.
inshAllah if he is the right man for you, everything will happen in its right time and place with your prayers and efforts.

No it isnt Islam always wants peace and harmony between people and therefore one has to have husne zann (good opinion) about his fellow Muslims.
one past mistake done will not mean they haven't repented. Benefit of doubt has to be given until there is some kind of proof.

It is highly recommended to mourn for Imam Hussein and his near and dear ones on the months of Muharram and Safar and infact all through the year. There is no grief comprehendible like grieving for the Prophet and his.pure progeny. It is also recommended that if one were to cry for their lost ones, they should remember the Ahlbayt a.s and also cry for them. This makes the bereavement reach higher reward and acceptance.
It is completely alright to remember your near and dear ones by praying and reciting Fateha for them and the best way is to first grant your prayers as a gift to the Ahlbayt a.s who will then in turn give the reward to the deceased in a complete and perfect way as suggested by great scholars.
In any case, reciting fateha for your father is still a great reward because the words and prayers are from no other source but the Almighty Allah whom the Ahlbayt were united with so it is also a way to earn their pleasure.

We all know that in every step of life, there is a challenge for us. When a mother brings up her child, she realizes this all the more because of wanting the best for her child especially if she believes in the hereafter because she wants the best for her child there too.
Likewise, you are feeling a hatred out of love for your son. Its quite obvious that you are concerned that he should have the benefits of this world as well as earn the pleasure of Allah and benefit from the next world too. Therefore there's work to be done.
Play your role of being a concerned mother for your son. You will not be able to.make things better if you Nag or show hatred to him. Face the confrontation if he has resolved with you and wanting to keep good relations. Count this as the first step that at least your son has realized the fact that a mother is of great importance in his life by now talking to you.
It is very unlikely that a mother hates her child and even if you think it is so, deep down if you ask your self, you will find out that you love him and want him to be a great Muslim.
Your not wanting to live is not in your choice, for you are the property of Allah and He will decide that. Life is a free gift and we only live once in this world. Allah wants us to taste the pleasure of loving Him through all these tests like the one you're facing right now..
Be brave and try your best to be compassionate with your son. Slowly he will begin to trust you and appreciate your concerns.
You can arrange some good meetings with the people who can change your sons life by having healthy conversation and probably advising him on the side.
Mentally prepare yourself that this is going to be painstaking and a struggle. Remember Allah will surely give you the answer to your struggle and this is His principle for all the humankind whether they be believers or not. In the end, the beleivers will procure the most of benefits.
Read on.how to deal with the youth too and listen to some good lectures on that. They're so many available online.
inshAllah with time you will get your results if you're set on your goal and are steadfast in that.

Imam Hussein enjoys a very high station near Allah and traditions are narrated that the dust around his sanctuary will cure all illnesses., These include the deseases of the soul as well as the body.
This blessed Turbah should be greatly respected and special ettiqutte should be followed to achieve maximum benefit from it.
The right way is to just take very little of it and mix it with as much water as you like, and you can benefit from reciting the dua before consuming it too even in his absence before he takes it.
Every action done with a sincere intention will certainly have its positive effect. Therefore, if you yearn for your sons guidance and give him the water without his knowledge, it will inshAllah cure him.
However, some scholar's have the opinion that if one doesn't have the love of Imam Hussein in his heart or doesn't have faith on his intercession even in this world, he will not get its benefit. There should be a respect for the beloved Imam for any result to be shown, be it in the presence of the one who is ill or even in his absence.
Many non Muslims have known to be cured by the miraculous turbah and although they didn't have faith in the religion of Allah, however they carried a respect in their hearts for Imam Hussein a.s.
Thus, if you can try to inculcate this love and respect of Ahl bayt a.s in your son's heart then inshAllah he will change even before taking the Turbah.
In any case, you have guardianship over your son since you have the honour of being his mother so you can do the best that you know will carry its positive effect.
Know that a mothers prayer for her child reaches acceptance so you have to do your best in all ways then leave the rest on Allah.
Allah finds excuses to guide and forgive His servants so you need not worry after trying your best and persisting in the best way possible.

Its great to realize the worth of your Mother and to take care of her although to attain the pleasure of Allah through the process can be quite of a challenge specially with the attitude your mum has.
Remember however much you wish to be protective about her, but in the end, life and death lies in the hands of Allah.
He has a plan for each one of His creatures and tests them according to their own capabilities.
If you are kind and caring to you parent, for sure you won't boss around and always make her feel she is above you so therefore do your duty to the best as far as caring is concerned and after that leave the result on Allah.
Your intense guilt towards the harshness to your mother shows that you are never going to make that mistake again and her forgiveness for you is the first thing to be hopeful that Allah has forgiven you too.
Dwelling on it will make you feel hopelessness and shaitan wants that you should feel this way so that you can add to your sins. Being despondent of Allah's mercy is nothing but a satanic ruse.
Try your best to please her and always keep calm with her. If she is paranoid and negative, your duty is to politely explain her without raising your voice and be positive even if it sounds pretentious.
If you're steadfast in this manner, itll affect both your lives for the better inshallah.

The love of Ahl bayt a.s. is the greatest asset we can ever have and pass on to the next generation specially our progeny to start off with.
Take it as a good sign that your five year old was concerned about Imam Hussein a s. and had to ask you this question.
You can explain you daughter going step by step with short sentences like,
Imam Hussein really loved Allah and out of this love, he promised he will do all that he can and should to.make people become good the way Allah wants.
He promised to Allah that he will be the best servant.
He knew that some people in this world are not good and infact very evil so whilst he was doing his best to guide them, they killed him.
Although he had all the powers to stop that, and also help was sent by Allah through thousands of Angles, but he wanted to do it with his own strength and energy like the normal people to show.them that they can keep.their promise to Allah in difficult times and be the best of servants even if they would face some kind of danger.
This way, Allah now has made him to be so beloved near everyone that until today we are remembering and crying for him.
This also shows how Allah loves him.

The month of Muharram is indeed a month of mourning, and azadari is a slogan of Allah. To uphold this sacred slogan, we need to show that to all around us by attending azadari especially.
The right thing would to politely excuse yourself because the love of the Holy Prophet and His pure progeny carries more importance in your heart than even the nearest kith and kin. Try to remain very polite and also send your gift or visit them later on.
If you know for sure it would lead to severing family relations, and you're aware that there's no sin like mixed gathering or music, you can go for a few minutes and pray for the person.
The verse of the Holy Quran clearly states this in sura Tawba ayat 24.
Tell them, (O Prophet): "If your fathers and your sons and your brothers and your wives and your tribe and the riches you have acquired and the commerce of which you fear a slackening, and the dwellings that you love, if they are dearer to you than Allah and His Messenger and striving in His cause, then wait until Allah brings about His decree. Allah does not guide the evil-doing folk."

Najaf is also known as Najafe Ashraf ie the The Most Noble city of Najaf.
After the Holy Prophet a.s , Imam Ali being the most Noble and excellent of Mankind resided in this Holy city. He practised all the teachings of Allah and the last prophet s.a.w. so wherever he laid his footsteps upon of course becomes the most Noble too.
As for Kaaba known to be Shareef ie Noble, it is a title that is not mentioned anywhere in the Holy Quran where we have Baytul Mamoor, Baytul ateeq, and so forth. Comparing both Kaaba and Najaf being Noble and Most Noble is not the right thing because each one carry a special status although it is the presence of.the most Noble of.mankind that we will.come to.know about the significance of the Kaaba and Allah Himself has approved of this in so.many.verses of the Noble Quran!

One of the things about life is that there are always temptations out there that shaitan lays for us. If you're unhappy in your relationship then it might not necessarily be your feelings for your sister in law, maybe you need to resolve with your wife by talking to her. If you talk to her lovingly and let her know that you don't want to loose her, and that she has to try to make you feel that in every way, be it physically or emotionally, then im sure she will do so. Be patient and try your best at the same time. Your efforts will surely pay.
All married women would like to secure their marriage and your wife is no exception.
At the same time, you have to completely refrain thinking of anyone else specially her sister. Try to avoid any kind of meetings or confrontations by excusing yourself and seeking refuge in Allah from shaitan. Don't let anything remind you about her if you wish to keep your marriage and not do anything forbidden.
In Islam, you cant marry two sisters at the same time so if you end up separating with one sister for the other, just imagine the repurcussion of not only breaking a marriage, but also breaking the hearts of two siblings and the family bond they share.
You really have to focus on your marriage. If you focus elsewhere the marriage can't work. All relationships go through ups and downs but if one tries his best and wants to keep his marriage especially for the sake of Allah, then he surely will get the result of his efforts as promised by Allah Himself.
Remember, this is probably just a phase that you might be going through but never give in to the false temptation. Consider it small compared to the great things in life that Allah has created us for, like the ultimate love we should have for Allah only and all his creatures for His sake, and attachment to the Holy Prophet and his pure progeny, how Allah wants perfection for us through knowledge and practice like patience and thankfulness, and how we should have great aims in life to achieve these perfections.
If you really can't figure out how to get your relationship with your wife back on track, talk with a therapist or better still, a learned and experienced person and and get some advice, but don't just let it linger because shaitan will take over step by step until he makes you do something drastic which you will always regret.

Salam.
Initially, it may seem unrealistic that any pleasing or harmonious sound could be forbidden and one will be given such a painful punishment for indulging in such a thing, but there is no need to be amazed.
Many verses and traditions point out why ghina ie music is forbidden.
In.short it brings about shamelessness in a person and shaitan overwhelms one listening to it such that he or she starts performing all the satanic acts such as lustful acts and so forth. The intellectual capacity of the person is also reduced and animalistic desires are overtaken. It effects the nervous system also and causes many aliments like high blood pressure and heart problems.
In short, one will be oblivious about the rememberance of Allah and his real aim in life. This infact disrupts the peace within him.
I suggest you read the book "status of Music in Islam" by Saleem Bhimji. This book is available online.
I pray you overcome this feeling that Music is too pleasurable to forego.